Step 1
"Humility and self-abnegation are the foundation and beginning of the service of G-d. These we must have before all else, and thereafter - having laid this foundation - we may go on to specific attainments in the service of G-d."
The Rebbe, obm
Likkutei Sichos
Vol. 1, p. 166
We begin our service of G-d with humble acknowledgment by admitting our dependence upon Him. That is why we begin each day with the admission: "Modeh ani - I acknowledge [...that You have restored my soul]" and our morning prayers with "Hodu l'HaSh-m - Acknowledge the L-rd."
We cannot begin to be transcend our limitations until we first let go of the prideful illusion of self-sufficiency. Thus, the beginning and foundation of purposeful, useful living - not just on a daily basis but in all matters - is the surrender of self.
This first step requires no great intellectual or emotional advancements - just admission. We have all taken various routes to arrive here - some of us only after facing staggering defeat - but all of us begin at the same place.
Our transformation into more peaceful, joyous, couragous and effective beings does not come all at once. But it most surely begins with a mere acknowledgement - the admission of our dependence upon G-d.
4 shares:
Yep, whatelse is there to say. That's the truth and only way for this recovering addict.
don't be so shy--shy 1. It's nice to see some new names around here/like the saying goes --keep coming back.
What it is it that I am recovering from anyway. Am I recovering from my sickening heroine addiction? Am I recovering from the thoughts that bounce between my head- telling me that the things which would more than likely be seen by others in some kind of terrible horror film,- is the life that I williing chose for myself-- for a third of my life. Sounds kind of funny hearing that as I write this-but that's the reality of how it went down.. This --this, is true. This,the reality that I am here, and I am now - is true. This,this MUST mean that miracles are true.- Anyway, back to how it went down(one of the times.) I was probally 25 years old. I walked out
of the quaint carriage house that I was renting in Royal Oak.Just far enough away from downtown to be called quaint..just close enough to be considered hip. I had been clean for a while and told myself that after a year of methadone maintenence and not shooting dope I would reward myself. I walked to the car dealer on the corner--I distinctly remember knowing I was going to be taken by some sleazy car salesman, funny thing was that I didn't care. I walked into the Buick dealership and rode out in a new Supercharged Riviera. I was on top of the world. It was my first new car and I loved it. Summer had just begun and I remember rolling the windows down. The fresh summer air blew through my car and left me with a feeling of pure bliss. I could not ever imagine going back to a life of drugs and devistation. After all I had not shot dope in over a year and could not ever imagine doing it again. My music career was back on track and things had not been better in a long time. That evening I headed to a club-\Long gone now but it was th place to be in the day.-The Music Menu Cafe in Grektown. I had been going there for years. Two or three times a week. Starting my senior year of high school I would go and watch all the legends of Detroit play Jazz. I soaked it up like a sponge. Difference is this time I was not going to soak it in-- My band was the featured act every Sunday and Tuesday night, and had been for some time- I had graduated. I don't know what it was, I had driven this highway hundreds of times back and forth. A perfect evening-- like I said, wind blowing through my hair. Something made me turn the wheel. A split second decision, It happened so fast that I remember not being able to control it- It happened so slow that I will never forget it. I had turned down the dope rode. No reason, no reason at all. I often wonder if I would have just kept going straight how much different my life may have been. In 6 months my whole house may not have been covered in tarps because the coke in my veins told my brain that there were mice in all of the cabinets and all of the closets of my house. In a year I may not have went from having no criminal record to being intimately fimiliar with just about every jail cell in Oakland and Wayne county. In eighteen months I may not have walked into a courtroom with syringes in my suit pocket-(and got cought.) I may have been able to continue my success that I had been enjoying as a musician. None of that mattered anymore. If I would have just kept driving straight--One turn, One thought transformed my life into that terrible horror movie that I mentioned earlier. So once again, I ask myself. What is it that I am really RECOVERING from?--TRUTH....Same as I KNEW what the consequences of that turn would be before I took it, I know the answer to that question../
I am recovering from myself.
Wow, Heller C
I hear what u sayin'. there is somthing inside of us that is different than the rest of the world. It has nothing to do with the substance that I use, but the person who I am. And i need to change me.
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